March 2018
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TEACHING SMALL TALK SKILLS: THE BUILDING BLOCKS OF NETWORKING
Jane Dunphy, Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Cambridge, Massachusetts, USA

Examining the role andcomplexities of small talk in American professional life provides an excellent context for constructive international teaching assistant (ITA) communication training. Teaching this topic explicitly allows us to integrate culture and communication in a compelling way, with a natural scaffolding of tasks from informal to formal. My students and I take the following steps early in a semester-long course on advanced speaking and active listening to develop small talk skills for different contexts. The many short activities culminate in a longer simulated academic social event that allows participants to “party”—that is, practice networking in an extended context.

Step 1: Examining the Role of Small Talk in U.S. Culture

I use two short videos to introduce the topic of small talk. Students watch “How to Make Small Talk,”by Business Insider before class. They use the following questions as a guide, take notes, and come prepared to compare small talk conventions in the United States with those of their countries:

  1. According to Business Insider, what does research tell us about small talk in the USA?

  2. ARE is an acronym for three verbs. What are they? What do they mean in the context of small talk?

  3. What is your experience with small talk?

I introduce the second video segment in class: “Data Explains Small Talk.” Students enjoy the humor in this clip from Star Trek, and it serves as a good transition to in-class activities.

Give students the Small Talk 1 Handout (Appendix A).

Step 2: Practicing Discourse Patterns

Share the following three general tips for success in small talk:

  1. Ask open-ended questions.

  2. Expand in your responses to others’ yes/no questions.

  3. Keep your tone positive and try to avoid negative topics.

Discuss these tips and then work with students to identify the verbal moves of small talk. Provide them with the Small Talk Handout 2 (Appendix B).

Step 3: Expanding to Academic Small Talk

As part of small talk dynamics in social or academic gatherings on campus, graduate students are often required to summarize the essence of their intellectual interests in a short time (30–90 seconds) and in a compelling way. But speaking too long or in too much technical detail can bore new acquaintances in an initial meeting.

In these contexts, it is helpful to be able to provide a conversational and extemporaneous “snapshot” in response to two questions:

  • “What are you working on?”

  • “Why does it matter?”

In the world of management, this oral summary is referred to as the “elevator speech.” In the academy, it can be considered “an academic minute.” For students, it is sometimes also called the “research snapshot” or “snapshot” dissertation.” Provide students with the Small Talk Handout 3 (Appendix C).

Step 4: Pulling It All Together—A Simulated Academic Networking Event

This activity provides a chance to initiate small talk, to exchange conversational research profiles, and to demonstrate familiarity with the fundamentals of networking. Place the following on the board as you explain the activity to your students:

The scenario: Top graduate students from around the world, including you, are gathering at XYZ University to receive awards from the university president for “most promising young researchers.” Before the ceremony, everyone gathers for an opening reception, with delicious finger food and cocktails to enjoy as you mingle at the president’s residence. You want to use this opportunity to network.

Circulate and use your academic small talk skills—both verbal and nonverbal—to find out about the other award winners. Try to spend no more than 5 minutes in any one group before moving to another. Remember to

  • Take a sincere interest in others; find common ground.

  • Ask open-ended questions and expand in your responses to others’ yes/no questions.

  • Keep tone and conversation positive; avoid the negative .

The debrief:Share your experience. Which small talk behaviors did you find manageable in our simulation, and which were difficult? Based on your experience, what other behaviors would you add to the networking toolkit?

Conclusion

ITAs generally recognize the need for small talk in the classroom and beyond. But navigating the norms of this social activity is tricky. This series of activities allows them to explore, within a cultural framework, some of the suitable topics, functions and patterns associated with this informal type of discourse. As a result, students enhance their active listening skills and grow increasingly confident in the appropriateness and flexibility of their social communication habits.

Appendix A: Small Talk 1

  1. Anticipate Suitable General Topics

The video “How to Make Small Talk” mentions some topics to avoid. Discuss the table below with a partner and debate the suitability of each topic for small talk. Note that in some contexts, a topic that is normally suitable becomes unsuitable. For example, sports can be a suitable small talk topic in the United States, but praising the Red Sox’s latest win over the Yankees could be problematic at a job interview in New York.

Small Talk Topics Suitability


Never

It depends

Usually

OK

Notes

Weather



Ö


Sports


Ö


Red Sox vs. Yankees in New York

Salary





Health





TV shows





Politics





Religion





Other?






  1. Find Talking Points About the Topics

Just as we can anticipate topics for typical informal conversations that take place in the lab or in class, at student orientation events, at conference receptions, or in job interviews, we can also find information in advance about these topics to use as talking points.

What are some reliable sources of information that you can use to initiate small talk?

E.g., University student newspaper;

Appendix B: Small Talk 2

  1. Identifying the Verbal Moves of Small Talk

    Examine the dialogue below. What do you notice about the content and “rhythm” of the exchange?

Context: Two students at the Fall 2017 Graduate Student Orientation

A: Hi, how are you?
B: Hi, good thanks. Happy to finally be here! Did you just arrive?
A: No, I’ve been here for a week. But I’m still settling in. What about you?
B: I just got in last night from Rome. Have you found a place to live yet?
A: I was lucky. I got a place in S & P in the housing lottery. What about you?
B: Not as lucky as you. I finally found a place with two Harvard students on Mass Ave.

  1. Creating the Moves

With a partner, choose a small talk context and compose a short small talk exchange between two people. Try to create a suitable “rhythm” like the one in the dialogue above.

Context of your dialogue
:

Person A:
Person B:
Person A:
Person B:
Person A:
Person B:

  1. Adding Nonverbal Moves to Your Verbal Small Talk Toolkit
We can learn and adopt appropriate nonverbal behaviors for networking, like these:
  • Listen actively: Look directly at the person who is speaking and nod as you listen.

  • Display open body language: Avoid frowning and folding your arms in front of your body.

  • Try to keep your hands free when you initiate small talk so you can use them to shake hands, make gesture, etc.

With a partner, come up with strategies for the following situations:

  1. It’s often easier in a large social space to approach small groups rather than large ones for networking. It’s also a good idea to try to mingle with more than one small group. What are the best verbal and nonverbal moves to enter a group?

  2. How can you keep your hands free and still enjoy food and drinks in a social setting?

  3. What do you do/say when you want to move on to another group in a large social space?

Appendix C: Small Talk 3

  1. Moving Beyond Weather and Sports

MIT-TV provides a collection of chemistry graduate students describing their research interests in 60–90-second “research snapshots” or “academic minutes.” Visit http://techtv.mit.edu/collections/chemvideos/videos to choose among the collection of “research snapshots” videos. Analyze the videos of three to five of these students. As you watch, note some of the expressions that the students use to introduce their research interests, e.g.: “I’m interested in learning how…”

  1. Your Academic Minute

Work with a partner to compose a short informal exchange about your respective disciplinary research interests that might occur as an extension of small talk. Try to combine statements and questions to compose a realistic exchange.

Person A:
Person B:
Person A:
Person B:
Person A:
Person B:


Jane Dunphy is a senior lecturer and directs the English Language Studies program at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. She teaches a variety of subjects in professional and cross-cultural communication and is coauthor, with Catherine Ross, of Strategies for Teaching Assistant and International Teaching Assistant Development (Jossey-Bass, 2007).

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